some recent thoughts (my brain is really overwhelmed so here is literally a list of things that I have thought about recently)
What's for dinner?
I am so tired. But the kids all sleep pretty well now. Why am I still so tired?
Motherhood is still exhausting even when your kids learn how to sleep.
I have been tricked.
I wonder what's for dinner…
Why are Palestinian people still being murdered?
And now Lebanese people?
Why is there no government action on actual children having their lives and livelihoods ripped away?
Is it because modern Australia is built on brutality and colonialism and land theft?
This is a crazy fucking time to live in.
Humans should have moved past this by now.
What will I cook for dinner I wonder?
It seems very warm for October?
But it is nice to be outside.
Gardening really is like therapy.
I really love flowers.
And watching bees.
We have really lost our way as a species.
I feel very grateful for my garden, my family, my life.
I am REALLY tired though.
Sometimes it feels excruciating that my kids frolic under trees we have planted for them, while other kids are bombed because of greed and power.
I actually don't know how to live with this.
But I still have to figure out what the fuck is for dinner.
Every. Single. Night.
The mental load of mothering and household management is way bigger than I ever imagined.
Is this why my brain feels like it is shrouded in relentless fog?
Is this why I can't quite figure out who I am anymore?
I actually don't have the energy to really engage with this right now.
Thank god for real conversation with other mums.
Why aren't we training the AI to clean the toilets?
Toddlers are hilarious. And pretty cute. And quite frustrating.
How does everyone else do it all?
Is it naive to long for a simple, satisfying life where humans didn't bomb the fuck out of one another and we hadn't abused the Earth to the point of catastrophe?
I still have hope. It is a flicker.
For real though, what is for dinner…?
